Becoming Foster Parents - Again

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Becoming Foster Parents - Again

Postby Ivydragon » Aug 01, 2008 10:52 am


I'm new to probably a bunch of you in here . . . but I'm really an old timer - used to be Admin. around here, but not for several years, now.

My two oldest are HG babies (except my first is now taller than me). We've adopted twice, once as foster parents in Utah, and then an Agency turned private adoption last summer - and they are both 7 (born 2 months apart).

We've been dealing with some of the residual affects of adoption - since it's typical for 7 year olds to question their adoptions, because instead of just a nice story they start to reallize it's real. Adam thought he'd been stolen, and was oppositional because of it, and Andrew is still struggling with believing he won't ever be moved again, but all in all things are settling and we are all happy and healthy, and well. We've had diagnoses of asthma, ADHD in both boys, and ODD in both boys as well, and getting a name for what we were dealing with, and medication after months of counseling has helped us to help them.

We thought we were done - adding kids to the family and everything. We always wanted three boys, considered our girl a bonus, and that we could finally settle down to raising our kids, and not worrying about where the next one was coming from. Wrong! After months of thoughts popping into my head about becoming foster parents every time I saw a kid in need on the news, I finally discussed it w/ dh, and he picked up the paperwork. This time around we've been blessed - I don't know if God is making our path smooth, or if we're just used to the process, but the process had had no hiccups - my fingerprints came back fast (last time they took 4 months), the homestudy visits (2), have been easy, we even enjoyed the PRIDE foster training! We have finished training, and turned in all our paperwork, and have our 2nd home visit on Monday. Unless someone has a serious concern about us, we'll be licensed by the end of August. We are interested in girls, 0-3, ok with a sibling group of 2. We'll see what happens. We've been warned that we'll be bombarded with phone calls. Alden is convinced that we'll be adopting again - I think I'm afraid to hope. The process is really long here in Idaho - Adam's fostering was completed, including the adoption process, less than a year after placement in our home, and we were his only foster placement. This will easily be 2-3 years, and that's if we actually get to adopt the first chidlren placed with us, and we could really get anything - 2-3 days to 2-3 year placements that still return home, so I'm afraid to be too hopeful at first, because I don't know that we'll adopt our first placement - just have to trust that if God wants us to adopt again, it'll happen in it's own due time.

I've told Alden this is our "oops" - you know, those bumper kids at the tail end of a big family that weren't planned, or came years later . . . but he said we can't "oops" and adoption. hehe.

I hope everyone is well, and I have time to stick around for a while before Aaron starts Virtual H.S., and school starts in the fall, and all my piano students come back from summer breaks.

Huge hugs to everyone.

Mom to Aaron 14 (HG), Anna 11 (HG), Adam 8 (adopted), Andrew 8 (adopted), fostering a newborn . . .
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Postby Susannah » Aug 20, 2008 1:43 am

Congratulatoins on the next part of your journey. I hope the process goes smoothly for you.
Elizabeth born at home 5/25/06 HG 8 weeks-delivery
Rose became our angel 8/2/07
Grace born at home 5/23/08 HG 7 weeks-delivery

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Postby zoe-down-under » Aug 26, 2008 5:31 pm

Hi Andy,

Wow congratulations! I totally know what you mean. We are foster parents and always sway between being finished and going again. It seems like just when you think your done, one more doesn't seem too much!

Good luck, I hope you have smooth sailing in every aspect and that you get that phone call very soon.


Zoe from Australia
DD '98 - Moderate HG
Foster DD joined us in 2004 - No HG! ;)
Angel loved and lost Jan 07 - Severe HG
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Location: Australia

Postby RebeccaM » Aug 26, 2008 10:47 pm

Whoa, sorry I missed this Andy! That's great! Your little family has become quite large over the years. I'm glad to hear you are all doing well. Good luck with the fostering. I'm glad things are going more smoothly this time around. It's nice to see an update from you. Keep us posted when you can!
Mom to:
Tierra Ashlee 9/15/03
Eli Spencer 7/16/05
Haylee Belle 3/4/09
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Postby Ivydragon » May 02, 2009 7:58 pm

We got a 4 month old girl in December, and just sent her home to her mom yesterday. It was really cool because her mom did everything the state asked her to, and there was really no reason not to reunify. Very cool to be a part of that.

In the meantime, we were called about a Heroine baby in Feb., and after visiting her in the hospital, she was discharged to the state, and handed to us. Now she's two months old, 8 lbs. 5 oz., and doing well. Off all of her medication, and we're quite enjoying her. Parents are working on reunification.

Eventually one of these little angels will stay and already be home for good. In the meantime, we'll help families heal.

Things are pretty much status quo with the rest of the family. Aaron's finishing his freshman year in H.S., Anna to enter middle school this year (both still involved in homeschooling programs) Adam and Andrew are now 8, and we're pursuing a new counselor for both. They are both public schooled and doing well academically.

Being a mom of 6 was crazy, but I'm good at 5 - maybe the best mom with 5. It's interesting, that's for sure.

Hugs to everyone - Andy
Mom to Aaron 14 (HG), Anna 11 (HG), Adam 8 (adopted), Andrew 8 (adopted), fostering a newborn . . .
Devoted to You
Posts: 1350
Joined: Mar 31, 2004 12:55 am
Location: Northern Idaho

Postby theannex » May 03, 2009 6:30 am

I'm so glad you checked in! It still seems like there is something missing when I come on the boards without you posting, even after so long. You have such a giving heart, and you are doing a very wonderful thing for those foster babies. Do you have a blog or other way for your old HG buddies to follow you nowadays?
mom to DD (b. 2003, had severe HG with PICC/TPN) and DS (b. 2007, controlled HG with pre-emptive meds and also diet-controlled GD)
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Re: Becoming Foster Parents - Again

Postby spottedowl » Aug 29, 2012 9:11 am

Ahhh.. Good luck!! We also did foster adoption.. and it is tramatic! Our child was young... but not young enough.. our child still understood where she comes from.... and we are not her Birth parents... what a struggle that is.. It took is 4 years to adopt through foster care. What hell that was too! Good luck in your journey.
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Re: Becoming Foster Parents - Again

Postby sweetpea » Aug 29, 2012 9:23 am

We have a 15 month old foster daughter that we got when she was 3 months old. She has no visitation as her parents are incarcerated, and she's just a wonderful part of our family. Courts recently decided to start TPR and we're hoping to adopt - although we know it's likely to take a year for everything to be finalized.
Faith - April 1, 2009
Grace - November 26, 2010
Ladybug (foster baby) June 7, 2011

Angel baby January 2012
Angel baby February 2012

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