by HdGAMom2B » Jun 24, 2004 5:36 am
Andrea, Coming from another woman who's got a BM Letter out there, I really ilked yours! I think you spoke form your heart, and wre sensitive to the needs and desires/emotions of the birthfmaily. Be sure that when you send it to the agency, that you separate the paragraphs, because that will make your letter seem shorter. Will you be puttin glots of photos in there, because that will flow with the letter also. Photos of you and your mother, the yellow house, your children, that school you met at. There are many things in your letter I really liked, and I think that you can't avoid but tell WHY you're adopting. BUT, you can also just give some general info on that. Even though to YOU it is a pivitol part of your life, she wants to know how you will raise this child, what kind of person you are, and not just your past experiences trying to be a Mom. Just be mindful that this letter is the snapshot of how you and your hubby are. So don't get hung up on 'being chosen', or the feelings that you, on the flip side, might be able to choose how your adoption senario might come.
As long as you are completely open to how and when your child coems to you, by GOD,a nd in God's timing (and i see that you acknowledgd that beautifully), your letter will be fine.
I think that you should tryr to put yourself in the shoes of the birthmom, if you can, and read someone elses letter, and see if you know what life is liek in that home. How they'd raise that child, and see if you know them better, after reading their letter. Then, read yours again, and see if you would know you and your husband's realtionship, your lives ambitions, your personalities,a nd your dreams about parenthood this time around.
Some people choose to mention their children's persnalities, their hobbies, the kind of lifestyle you have with them. How they feel about your choice to adopt.
Some people talk about their experiences, vaguley, saying that you've lost children, experienced serious health issues, which you've turned in to a ministry to others living with the same health challenges. Being too detailed about why you're adopting, and now touching on you and your hubby, and you rlife, may give her one windowin to your life, but int he end, it's WHO you are, WHAT you do in life, and HOW you'll raise the child she's carrying.
I"m no pro. I just hava big mouth, and wanted to share my opinions. We've all got one, and some stink. I hope mine doesn't.
Beautiful Heatfelt Letter Andrea!
Christy
*We're pregnant!! 30 wks -due March 24th, 2005
*Failed adoption after 6 wonderful days (baby Claire Delaney, b. 5/6/04)
*'Therapeutic Termination' at 11 wks. due to mistreated HG in first pg, term. 6/15/99