Not sure where to post, but I took the pg test and

[emily]

I cannot tell! Grr. At first, it looked absolutely negative and I walked away so relieved. Then, I decided to go fish it out of the trash and double check. This was about 15 minutes later. Well, then I thought, there is a second line there. The evap line is very dark and there is almost a second line, not directly where it says the Test line should be, but on that side. It is barely there, there is other color there, and it doesn't go the whole way up. Sigh. So is it positive? Any line is positive, I KNOW that. But, I can't tell for sure if this is a line and I know the test was upside down in the trash and it was longer than 10 minutes past the test time. Ugh. I am so irritated. I am getting two more tests tomorrow (which is my birthday, yay me - dripping with sarcasm) and if there is any doubt, I am going to the doc. I know I cannot do another HG pregnancy. I cannot. I will not. I am going to be devestated if this test is positive and I have to terminate. I don't even know where to start with a termination. Well, I posted here and deleted and now I am posting again. I cannot believe this could even happen. I don't even quite fully know HOW it happened. Well, I mean I know how. Sigh....

[PamelaRose]

Oh, how frustrating! I'm just going to tell you this and then duck and run...

When I did the hpt with Brody, I got negative. I threw the stick in the trash in disgust, and hours later DH dug it out (thinking he was going to see something I'd missed?). And he DID find the very faint tinge of a second line. I tried to explain all about evaporation lines and how the test changes after 20 minutes or 2 hours or whatever the window is... Anyways, I tested again at the dr's office a few days later and it was obviously positive.

I really, really, really hope this test was just a hard-to-read fluke and you get the results you're looking for tomorrow. Hugs!

[aaronsmommy]

I think I would be doing about 6 other tests tonight if I got something like that!

Did you see my post about my scary nightmare? I hope you get to wake up from yours tomorrow when you take the other tests, and it all turns out okay.

I wish I could tell you how to get through if it was positive, but I really don't know myself.

[emily]

No, I totally understand. My tests with DS were all soooo faint, but they were all only 10 dpo and I am like, over a week late (I think, based on my last period but I have only had one postpartum period). Actually more like two weeks. I think I started my last period on the 12th. Part of me thinks I would be sick at this point if I was pg, and I am not really sick at all. And part of me thinks I would have gotten a more definitive line at this point. And then part of me says, well, who knows for sure when I ovulated! I am having other problems, like headache and dizziness. The only reason I am thinking pg is because I haven't gotten another period. I feel like I should be, I am getting bad cramps and everything just like I did with my last period. And then I think, well I could be pregnant. I looked at the test when dh got home and he noted the only place with no color is where the test line should be. I had noticed that too. And, there are now 3 lines on the test, the dark evap line and 2 faint lines not where the test line should be. But still. And then part of me is still stuck on something like cancer or something going on. This sucks.

[teddi]

well, if your cycles are right, and you *were* pg, maybe this means the HG fairy skipped you?

Hopefully, your cycle is just off and your tests will be confirming negatives!

[nomore]

Emily-

Well- Happy Birthday Ill start the post with something happy

Reading your post is probably for many of us like a nightmare.... Im REALLY hoping for you that the test was just a fluke with the way the lines dried. That being said, with my last 2 pregnancies, my lines were very light for a while after I was prego. Im really hoping that the test is negative for you.... and that being said.... if for some reason its not, well, Im here to hold your hand for that too.

((((((((((((((((EMILY)))))))))))))))

Hoping and praying its just your BFing cycle all wacky for you... (not getting AF, as a reminder I wasnt prego was the one thing I HATED about BFing.... )

Robin

[emily]

Thanks everyone. I am so excited because today is the day we finally sign the papers to close on our refinance on our house. This has been soooo freaking stressful. Far more stressful than buying was. I have been so on edge for the past couple of weeks. Now that I think about it, could just be the darned stress of this stupid refi. It has been one thing not going our way after another. BUT, today it will be done and life will go on, and I am very happy. Keeping my fingers crossed that there are no surprises at the signing.

Well, I have thought some more on that test and I don't think it was a very good test (lmao it did come from the dollar store!) but I really don't think there was a second line. Like I said, it wasn't where it should have been (it wasn't in teh test area) and it didn't go all the way across the test and there were so many other lines going everywhich direction and as dh pointed out, the only really clean spot was the test spot. And, I am not sick at all. Probably just breastfeeding and stress. All that said, I am still taking my other two tests when they get here today. LOL

[mandy]

Emily,

When ttc my son I took like a zillion tests (it did take 5 months to conceive mind!). Anyways, I am sure that my negatives tests dried with mysterious lines appearing. I remember playing mind games with myself thinking 'maybe' but in my heart knowing 'no'. It was after the 10 minutes like you, only when time had gone too far.

I don't want to give you false hope but I am sure this happened to me too. I really hope you are in the clear and your headaches etc resolve soon. Stress is such a powerful thing - if it can bring on heart attacks etc then I'm sure it can delay a period and cause other minor ailments too.

Happy birthday! Hope any wishes you make today come true! I can guess the wish you'll make as you blow your candles out!

Mandy x

ps. Pamela - I just loved that 'I'm gonna just tell you this and then duck and run!....' You really make me smile sometimes with your little comments like that!

[dwtegli]

Emily,

I hope that you get find out soon and know that whatever happens, you know that we are here for you. I am inclined to believe that you are not pregnant, that it is just the stress and the bf that is causing the mess up in your cycle.

Good luck, and please keep us posted.

[emily]

NEGATIVE!!!

Big FAT absolutely clear, NEGATIVE. I am almost ready to break down crying. OMG. I have never been so freaked out and shaking so hard. I couldn't wait, I went and got a mid-stream test that would be easier to read. Negative, no question, negative.

DH is sooooo getting that vasectomy. He can kiss my a$$. I was all, I shouldn't force him and blah blah blah, but this little fiasco has proven how soundly I am NEVER, ever going to go through HG again. I want to kiss this thing. Ewww. I won't though, I know I just peed on it. Now I am blabbering....

Okay, I AM crying now.

And you know what really, really pisses me off, is dh was just so, oh whatever. Like, I was actually going through being pregnant again? Like, would another baby really be so bad? Um, another BABY, no, another pregnancy from hell, YES! I just want to ring his little neck.

Deep breath, deep breath, I have to calm down and go to my mortgage closing now.
[/i]

[mandy]

I'm so pleased for you! I'm sure dh was just trying to say the right things incase things turned out differently..........??? You can enjoy your day now - have a good one!

M x

[bibliojo]

Happy birthday Emily! What a great birthday present!!! I'm very relieved for you. And now, after you get that mortgage closed, take some time for yourself! You obviously need some "Emily time"!

Joanna

[teddi]

GOOD! yay! A BFN!!!

I'm sooo glad. I'm glad your re-fi went thru too, (we're just getting started) I hope it saves you tons of money.

RELAX AND BREATHE NOW!!!!!!!!!!

[emily]

Okay, well other than everyone completely ignoring my birthday, all has been well. The refi - we actually aren't saving money, but we did get a half point lower interest rate, and $10,000 in cash, and our payment is only going to be $30 a month more. So, it worked out. We can pay off all of our credit cards and my medical bills etc and get back on track. I was thrilled to find out my credit score was slightly higher than dh's lol. I was actually not even on our old mortgage because my credit was so low and I could never figure out why considering we have been married since we were 20. So, mine is 718, just shy of that 720 golden mark. It feels good to know that I actually "own" our home now.

[dwtegli]

I know that feeling Emily, my husband and I just refinanced our home and my credit score was higher than his also. When we got married, mine was terrible due to my ex, but it has been long enough now and now it is clean.

I am glad you got the news you wanted yesterday, and I agree, your husband was probably just saying that in case the test went the other way.

(((HUGS))))

[BrandiJK]

I am glad your results came out as you wanted. And if you are clear (and it sounds like you are) on really being done, one of you get fixed so you don't ever have to go through this again!

And for future people going through this...I highly suggest one of those digital test sticks. Always seemed like a needless thing to me until those regular sticks became hard to read. W/ current pg, I went through 3 with strange results. One digital created clarity. (Luckly, I was trying LOL)

Glad your refi is getting all done, and hope you had a good day. And an even better year, completely HG free, to come!!!

[emily]

Well, dh was going to get a vasectomy and then he has refused because of all of the guys he knows with vasectomies telling him how horribly painful it is and blah blah blah.

And I was completely talked out of a TL by my midwife due to tubal pregnancy concerns.

I have to say, we WERE using condoms faithfully. It isn't like we were just being completely irresponsible. I am just not used to my period being "late" because it never was breastfeeding baby number one, even though I KNOW that is perfectly normal. And at first, I was just like, oh it is just breastfeeding and the only period I had had was much more postpartum that with dd. But then fear creeps into your head you know. I swear, everytime I get the stomach flu I think I could be pregnant! LOL I remember one time I hadn't even been having sex and I started conjuring up all of these ways I could have gotten pregnant. LOL

I don't know if I am the only one, I have always thought this has something to do with hg, but horomone birth control makes me soooooo sick.

Oh btw, the other thing that totally has ME not convinced on the vas is one of my best friends just got pregnant and her dh had a vas 9 months ago, went in for his 3 month follow up, zero sperm count, she got pregnant, he went back in, and he had sperm! OMG. And she told me that she would have never gotten pregnant if he hadn't had the vas because they would have been taking other precautions. Unfortunately, this happened toward the end of my pregnancy and I am totally freaked out about a vas failure.

[BrandiJK]

Well, dh was going to get a vasectomy and then he has refused because of all of the guys he knows with vasectomies telling him how horribly painful it is and blah blah blah

The men I know who have had this say it isn't all that painful, and it passes quickly. As for the vasec going aray...how common is that? Pretty scary! TL has a higher chance of pregnancy then Vas. I am shocked!

[PamelaRose]

Congratulations on getting the good news, Emily! I'm so glad it all worked out. I hope you can find some way to avoid any more worry down the road--aside from abstinence, that is. Hope your birthday turned out to be a good one.

[emily]

Well, dh was going to get a vasectomy and then he has refused because of all of the guys he knows with vasectomies telling him how horribly painful it is and blah blah blah

The men I know who have had this say it isn't all that painful, and it passes quickly. As for the vasec going aray...how common is that? Pretty scary! TL has a higher chance of pregnancy then Vas. I am shocked!

Well, actually, in talking to guys who have had vasectomies, several of them have had continual pain after the vas, which I guess is pretty common. My friend's dh was having a lot of pain with his before she got pregnant so maybe that is a bad sign lol. My midwife said that vasectomies and tl actually have almost the same rate of failure, but tl's can result in a tubal pregnancy making them far more dangerous. My friend said the rate for vasectomy (this is from her) failures is 1 in 1000 (if the vas was unchecked) and 1 in 5000 (if you actually go back and have a zero sperm count). So it IS rare. But, I was just so shocked she got pregnant. I really do feel like abstinence is the only sure thing and I am not willing to do that.

And quite frankly, I am not 100% sure I am done having kids. But I am 100% sure I am NOT going through close hg pregnancies. I sincerely believe considering how worn down I am already and with my thalessemia, that another pregnancy so close could put my LIFE at stake.

Well thank you all for your support and well wishes. I have since finally started my period. LOL I think it was stress from the refi. Now I am relaxed knowing $10,000 is being wired into my checking account Monday. LOL

And thank you all for the happy birthday wishes. Noone did anything for me, no cards, no phone calls, no "happy birthday", so it really meant a lot to me. You guys actually kind of cracked me up with thoughts that my dh was just trying to make me feel better. LOL My dh is the kind of guy that if you ask him a question, he is honest to the point of being hurtful. Sigh.