my life with HG

The HER foundation contributed letters from our forums members for a show that featured Hyperemesis as a topic. The show aired in April of 2007.

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my life with HG

Postby CareBearLowe » Feb 27, 2007 7:39 pm

Hi my name is carrie. I am 25 years old, and have a 2 year old Son named Landen. Before I got pregante I was a strong independant women that soon all changed. I have lived with HG twice. Here is my story..

At the age of 18 I found that I was pragnate. For weeks before I took the test I thought I had the flu. I soon found out other wise. I was 8 wks when I found out with my first one. I was in and out of the hospital for weeks. It seemed like a life time. I had a great mid wife and doctor; But they werent sure what was wrong with me. The doctors told me that my body was trying to reject the baby. I was having to be taken to the hospital every other day for IV fluid and shots of zofran. I would then go home and try to sip some water or flat soda. I tried everything from eating crackers to using sea sick bracletts. Nothing seemed to help. My relationship had ended after 3 and a half years with my then fiancee. I started feeling alone, lost, scared. I then had to deal with this by myself. I had alot of choices I had to make. I continued getting sick and it got to much to bare. When I was 11.5 wks I made a choice that would change my life forever. I went to see a doctor about 3 hours from where I live and had an abortion. I couldnt bare being sick anymore. I had many people who told me it was all in my head and that I made up being sick. At 18 I thought I wasnt a real women I couldnt carry and baby; I couldnt handel having a baby. I felt as if I was being punished for something I had done.

About 3 years later I met my now husband and from the start we wanted kids together. In the back of my mind I was scared but thought it would be different this time. I wasnt in a very good relationship the first time. I thought of everything I could to NOT prepare me for the worse. I did inform my husband that it may happen but I was in a loving and caring relasionship so I didnt think it would be bad just the normal "morning sickness". Soon after our wedding day we started trying for the family we both wanted. We tried for about four months and every month I would started my cycle like clock work. I soon started thinking I wouldnt be able to conceive because of my abortion. Then December 23, 2003 I found out I was pregnate. We were so happy. I couldnt wait to have my little bundle of joy in my arms. Then on January 6 my 22nd birthday it started going down hill from there. I started losing weight and losing it fast. I was never by any means a small women but when I was losing weight I looked like a whole different person.My friends were afraid to come and see me for fear they would find me dead.

I was in and out of the hospital for IV fluids. But I would just be sent back home. And I would fall right back into the same patern. I had stopped eating because I was afraid to get sick. I tried so hard to drink but even that became a challenge. The doctors had me coming in once a week for dcotor appts. to monitor my weight loss. I became very close with the OB ward at the hospital as well as the doctors office. When I hit about 12 weeks my Doctor had decided that it was time to put me on a picc line (a feeding tube). I had the picc line inserted into my right arm and was assigned a in home health nurse that came out to my house everyday. My husband was trained on how to changed my bag, He had to bath me, wash my hair; help me out of the bath and back to bed. I was so weak I couldnt get up to go to the bath room anymore to get sick so I had a bucket that the hospital had sent us home with that he would clean out for me when I would get sick.

About a week after having the picc line put in my arm started swelling and hurting to move. It started getting a fever in it. So I had a schedualed appt. with my doctors. I went and I couldnt move my arm anymore the doctor decided to hospiatlize me to find out what was happening with my arm. I had an ultra sound tech come in and do a check on my arm and found that I had developed a blood clot in my arm. That night I had to have the picc line removed from my right arm and moved into my left arm. By this I had emotionally had enough. I told the doctor that I wanted an abortion. I told the doctors and my family that if they sent me home again I was going to kill myself. I had lost my mind.

I was hospitalized for two weeks while they got my body some what back under control. During that time. I started to be able to eat drink get up and walk. I thought it was done and over with I was finally able to enjoy being an expectant mother. I started showing I was so happy. I was well for about a month. Then it happened again. I started getting sick. I was put back on bed rest. I was still in and out of the hospital on an everyother day basis. I was very well known there. They laughed saying I was there resident at the OB ward. I loved my nurses but not that much. They tried all kinds of pill combos to help subside the nausa. I took everything from zofran to reglan, Fenergan, to steriods. They finally found a combo that seemed to help. Which was zofran, Reglan, and steriods. SO I was taking about 10 pills a day, I had to take 2 zofran every six hours. 1 reglan every 4 hours. 2 steriods every 4 hours and 75 mil effexor, 20 mil adivan, and 200 mil loveanox (blood thinner). My husband had to give me my blood thinner shots twice a day in my stomach. My stomach had become so bruised that people thought that my husband was beating me.

My day was full of pills, sleeping and throwing up. Not much fun. I cried everyday. I felt like I was dying a slow and painful death. Then August came I was just a few weeks from my due date which was August 25. I started contracting but not dialiting. I started begging my doctors to induce. I just wanted it over with. They induced me finally on August 23 2004, at 5:30 AM. my water broke at 7:30 AM and was a very hard labor. I was rushed into Emergency surgery at 12:30. And my beautiful son was born at 1:11 august 23. He was 6.3 pounds and 19 inches long.

Landen is now 2 years old; and my husband and I want to have another one. I am very scared to go through it again. But while I was prgant with Landen I heard everything from I was faking it to get attention to it was all in my head. But thanks to HER and the Dr. Phill show for bringing this horrible disease to people attention I dont feel alone and maybe people will understand that we as women who suffer from this wish we could have the fairey tale preganacy. I am just thankful to know I am not alone and that there are others out there. Because I felt so misunderstode and alone. Thanks to everyone who has made this possible to educate everyone on this horrible disorder.

Thank you
I dont feel alone anymore

Carrie Lowe
Fortuna Ca
mother of the love of my life Landen 2 yrs
CareBearLowe
New Member
 
Posts: 2
Joined: Feb 27, 2007 6:04 pm

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